CosmiKnot

Feary  I have a feary. Fear is always the cognitive mind knowing the body needs to somehow know. That the mind needs to cede to the body. We conquer fear by working with the body and not running away into the mind’s Warren of fictions and fixations. Feel the body knowing and be on hand with help if needed. I’ve recently experienced unusual bodily sensations such as tingling back of my scalp almost like a rehearsed fear. Like a cat play fighting with an unseen mouse. I thought oh that’s unsettling and felt the need to worry and tense. Then I thought no let the body be. I thought the same recently when I misjudged the contents of the first joint I’ve ever rolled and my body started to feel a little undulating. Panic was on hand in the form of my mind saying see what you’ve done? Then I thought no it’s supposed to do this and lay back and enjoyed the experience. So Is bravery knowing with the body? 

  I’ve just watched Midsommar straight after watching Hereditary last night. This morning I wrote a poem about how it made me feel (wake up art I thought you were dead). Essentially the poem is about how I’ve noticed that art is a way we access the excess or the shadow in films. Think about all those serial killer’s sketch pads prepared by the film’s art directors. Hereditary had the sketch books of the Milly Shapiro character and the aesthetic of what turned out to be a cult of Satanists, whereas Midsommar took this much further into a whole complex ritualistic culture of a remote Swedish village. Anyone whose been near to my recent art making will have perhaps picked up my obsession with aesthetic ontology. I like to think that art can speculate about a culture that places feeling at the core – hence aesthetic ontology – this is what the village of Hargar in the film started to represent to me. In this realm, however, we do not abandon reason and our ability to problem solve usin...